If we drew a map of feelings and situations, we would realize that for many people loneliness and sadness are very close . This proximity is not only related to loneliness in the first person, but the feeling of grief for someone we perceive as isolated is also common.
However, nothing is further from reality. Loneliness can only be understood as a burden when it is imposed, when the person who feels without social support wants to have it and can not find a way to find it. This loneliness has a lot to do with the need to tell, to speak and to tell part of our history.
That is why it is such a harmful feeling in older people , they feel that they have accumulated a wisdom that they need to deliver in some way and that is why they are so grateful when we simply dedicate time to them. Because the sadness that accompanies the imposed solitude also has a lot to do with time and with the feeling that we are not, perhaps, valuable enough for someone to dedicate it to us.
On the opposite side is the chosen solitude, the need to be able to escape social noise . The concern to take a distance that gives us clarity, as if close we saw blurred. This type of loneliness is what makes us independent and gives us resources to enjoy and feel full, depending solely and exclusively on ourselves.
You can do what you want, when you want
If you are a person who loves solitude and you live alone in your home, it is likely that you have become accustomed to being the person you care about the most. Perhaps, in these moments you are even putting in the balance the advantages that the solitude supposes against those that would have a shared life.
In it, you are sure to put aside your plans, not give explanations or be able to make instant decisions; in the other, the security that would give you to have unconditional support , the need for welfare that emanates from the fact of sharing or the fact of being able to delegate some of the domestic responsibilities.
There are people for whom this daily solitude will be a transitory situation and others who will choose it forever . The best thing, be it from one group or another, is that your situation is the one you choose, not one that you have to adapt to because you do not have the opportunity to live otherwise.
You can love yourself before anyone
They say that loneliness helps you to grow as a person and to know you. However, keep in mind that this will not be the case if you immerse yourself in the frustration of not being able to get rid of her or of the feeling, if you start obsessively searching for a way to escape, as if she were a kind of lion in the Savanna.
If you learn to endure, to love, to accept your virtues and your shortcomings and ultimately, to love you, you will be on the right path to seek real happiness since you will not depend on having a romantic relationship or not to achieve it. The perfect relationship should be the one you have with yourself. Do not forget that the ones you generate with others will split from it.
Cultivate good friendships
Who says that loneliness is synonymous with being isolated or having no friends? Nothing is further from reality! Loneliness is your ability to live your way and that is not at all incompatible with having good friends who understand you, love you, respect your way of life and make you happy.
Also, when you decide to be alone, you are giving yourself the opportunity to meet new people thanks to the fact that you have started to do new activities without company . People who share your tastes and who will undoubtedly enrich your life. They are going to be part of that new air that enters her and those that make you give her the step of dispensing with some relationships that you just grabbed because of the fear of being alone.